Reflections 4: Virtue of Chastity

“27 You have heard that it was said, ‘Do not commit adultery’ 28 But I tell you that anyone who looks at a women lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart” ( Matthew 5:27-28, NKJV, Pp. 1476).

How many people in today’s world look at the opposite sex and think, “Wow! How awesome it would be to get (him / her) in my bed for a night? Lord…the things I would do to (him / her)!”  I know it’s a blunt statement, but the question has been one that thousands of different articles in any self-respecting women’s magazine has asked and answered a million times over. How many married men look at unmarried women with this one singular thought in their mind, “I could get away with it!” Presidents, Governors, Senators, Congressmen, and Hollywood Stars, and entertainers alike have sensationalized this unseemly activity, therefore indirectly indorsing sexual misconduct and promiscuity.  How many of them have gotten caught? While we are on this topic how many women have extra marital affairs because their husband were on a business trip or is emotionally not present in the relationship? Safe to say more than 50% of American women have these sexual encounters when their husbands are gone, i.e the very popular websites called, Find New Passion, Affairs Club, Dating Married Women, and Affair Link, all of which make a mockery of the institution of marriage. So then you might ask, “What if the women or man is separated from their respective spouse, not quit divorced yet? Is it ok then to go night clubbing, bringing the opposite sex to your house or apartment for the soul purpose of fulfilling some emotional need before the final papers are signed? Is this too adultery?” There is example after example of how we, (the people of the world), fall to Satan’s temptation of “Lust” ignoring the commandment of Jesus to guard against this invasion of the mind and soul, and instead practice Chastity!

At the risk of sounding old fashion, perhaps a little hypocritical, the idea is that if you are married you are in a relationship which God has blessed. Why would you through that relationship away at the first, second, or third little bump in the road? Unless there is adultery Jesus does not condone getting something extra on the side, nor does he condone divorce.

“31 It has been said, ‘Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.’ 32 But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for martial unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced women commits adultery”( Matthew 5:31-32, NKJV, Pp. 1476).

Together these two passages have convicted the world of adultery. So the question now must be asked, “Is it as cut and dry as this? Or does God forgive, and bless people who fall in love after divorce, who eventually get married and establish a true partnership in loving matrimony and faithfulness?” More importantly, “Can trust blossom where there once was adultery?”

It has been my experience that if one person in the relationship, (i.e. husband or wife, boyfriend or girlfriend, or even friends with benefits), have the notion or secretly plan to meet up with someone else outside there committed relationship for any reason, then that person takes on the burden of guilt. Because their sin is so great one or both relationships will fail. That person will be caught in a lie, or in a half-truth, the weight of their sin causes them to refuse their partner such things as information of their whereabouts, and even withholding sex from their partner. The defying silence as the communication between the devoted partners wane is what destroys trust and will kill the once blessed relationship. Satan’s attack isn’t complete as he seeks to destroy the illegitimate relationship with the guilt he used to destroy the ligament relationship. Remember, Satan wants you alone and defeated. There are as many reasons under the sun for these things to happen, but among the top three reasons you will find that money, loneliness, or simple lust is the culprit, the tools that Satan often uses to divide and concur. Therefore, it has been said that, “When you prize money over relationships, the relationship fails every single time” (Anonymous, 2011).   One could easily replace the word “money” with whatever the true cause of being unfaithful was in the first place, and get the same outcome. Jesus knew this, hence his comments on lust and of faithfulness in Matthew 5:27-28 and 5:31-32. No one likes the feelings associated with being taken advantage of, or being hurt by the one special person in their life who it was once thought, if not whole heartily believed, that would never disgracefully destroy and misuse their love in such a despicable manner. In fact it is of my humble opinion that “adultery”; or if you are not married then the term; “cheating” is the most selfish act a person could ever do against their beloved!

With all this said, we come to the purpose of the Virtue of Chastity. In short, the best description I could fine happens to come from the Catholic publication of the, New Advent, which states, “Chastity is the virtue which excludes or moderates the indulgence of the sexual appetite. It is a form of the virtue of temperance, which controls according to right reason the desire for and use of those things which afford the greatest sensual pleasures” (Melody, J. 1908, transcribed for New Advent by Potter, Douglas J., 2009)[i]   The phrase, “Abstaining from sexual contact” comes to mind. Again, at the risk of sounding old-fashion there is something to be said about the practice of courtship, dating, or wooing your partner into romantic love for the innocent purposes of abstaining from sexual intercourse until after marriage. The virtue of chastity demands self-control, propagates good health and hygiene through the embracing of moral wholesomeness, and is directly linked to the moral attribute of being honest with yourself, your family, your community, and to the world. If chastity is practiced in a romantic relationship then love is allowed to take root because trust, caring, nurturing words and actions have become the foundation. Within this the temptation of the sin of lust is defeated as there will never be placed into your mind and heart or that of your partners mind and heart the need to seek sexual satisfaction elsewhere for any reason. The ability to ignore these more carnal desires and from being distracted by or influenced by hostility, temptation, or corruption is directly in line with the moral obligation you have with your partner. Thus, upholding a higher level of trust, love, commitment, confidence, with your spouse or partner that in return fills the heart with God’s perfect love and perfect faith within those relationships where chastity is practiced.

It is not up to me to say whether God forgives those who have purposefully destroyed their family’s to hook up with someone else, or for those who have been unfaithful for the top three reasons listed above, or for any reason what so ever, but I can point out that the Bible holds a plethora of dysfunctional characters who have done all the above and more and still found favor with God. My favorite of these is King David.

“2 One evening David got up from his bed and walked around on the roof of the palace. From the roof he saw a woman bathing.  The woman was very beautiful, 3and David sent someone to find out about her. The man said, “Isn’t this Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam and the wife of Uriah the Hittite?” 4 Then David sent messengers to get her. She came to him and he slept with her. (She had purified herself from her uncleanness.) Then she went back home. 5 The women conceived and sent word to David, saying, “I am pregnant.” (2 Samuel 11:2-5, NKJV, Pp. 439).

One could say that King David’s actions with Bathsheba where no less sinful than anyone living in modern times. But the point of this scripture isn’t the commonality of his sin rather the blatant disregard for the sanctity of marriage, the disrespect paid to Uriah, and the defiling of Bathsheba. The other point is it takes two people in order for there to be adultery in the physical sense of the word. Therefore, both are just as guilty, because both parties acted upon carnal desires, or lust. However, interestingly enough we find out later in the Bible that King David was a man after Gods own heart, but undeniably David’s life after Bathsheba had increasingly become more difficult, because of their shared willingness to participate in adultery. On the other hand it cannot be denied that King David was still favored by God.

“22 After removing Saul, he made David their king. He testified concerning him; ‘I have found David son of Jesse a man after my own heart; he will do everything I want him to do’” (Acts 13: 22, NKJV, Pp. 1711).

Can we then deduce that God condoned David’s lustful ways? Absolutely not! David was just as human as anyone of us today, just as flawed, just as much a sinner, and in need of God’s mercy to the same degree as we do today. I would be lying if I said that God will not forgive you if you ask for forgiveness. The real path to God, to forgiveness rests within your own heart. “Can you forgive yourself of adultery?” Or if you were not the adulterer but instead found out that your partner committed this sin against (God first, themselves second, you third), then ask yourself this question, “Can you forgive your spouse, partner or loved one of adultery?” The knife cuts both ways, especially once understanding fully that chastity is the commandment from Jesus, from God as it is the only way to forgo the sin of lust which leads to adultery.

So whose example should we take if not our Lord and Saviors? How about JOB who stated,

“1 I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a girl. 2 For what is man’s lot from God above, his heritage from the Almighty on high? 3 Is it not ruin for the wicked, disaster for those who do wrong? 4 Does he not see my ways and count my every step?”(JOB 31:1-4, NKJV, Pp.762)

JOB’s words of wisdom can be applied to both men and women equally, and if we go back to King David, what was his wage for the sin of adultery? According to Nathan who was sent to King David by God to deliver to him a message of disaster and ruin for his wicked ways;

“11 This is what the Lord says; ‘Out of your own household I am going to bring calamity upon you. Before your very eyes I will take your wives and give them to one who is close to you, and he will lie with your wives in broad daylight. 12 You did it in secret but I will do this thing in broad daylight before all Israel. 13 Then David said to Nathan, “I have sinned against the Lord.” Nathan replied, “The Lord has taken away your sin. You are not going to die. 14 but because by doing this you have made the enemies of the Lord show utter contempt, the son born to you will die” (2 Samuel 12:11-14, NKJV, Pp. 441).

The son of King David and Bathsheba conceived from the adulteress affair, the cause that made David have Bathsheba’s husband Uriah killed in battle. The sin of adultery which led to murder, God then demanded the life of an innocent child, but the true punishment upon David as he agonizingly stood ideally by, completely powerless to do anything to save their son, was in fact found within his torment of having to watch the life of his son be extinguished. This was the collective wage of King David and Bathsheba’s sin of adultery.

Our Lord God sees everything we do. He sees our achievements, our epic failures. He sees our acts of charity, and our sins. God gives, but He also takes away. God forgives, but he also punishes. The Lord Almighty is gracious and yet stern in his commandments. He guides us in the ways of righteousness and holds our hand when we need his comfort, and he is so eager to take back our hand after we have pulled away from him through sin. Through Moses God demanded we do not commit adultery, for it is sin, perpetrated through the temptation of lust. But as surely as He commanded us not to sin in this fashion he gave us a Heavenly alternative, that of the Virtue of Chastity.

Challenge question: “Thou shalt not commit adultery.” But most of us have. So what is our wage for this sin? Will it be as JOB stated, and King David suffered?


If you have been moved by this blog I humbly invite you to leave a message telling me your thoughts and how this reflection has touched you. May peace and love be with you all the days of your life.  May God keep you and bless you.

[i] Melody, J. (1908). Chastity. In The Catholic Encyclopedia. New York: Robert Appleton Company. Retrieved July 29, 2011 from New Advent:

Reflections 3: Virtue of Charity

“4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part, and we prophesy in part. 10 but when perfection comes, the imperfection disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child; I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. 12 Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then shall I know fully, even as I am fully known. 13 And now these three remain; faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love” (1 Corinthians 13: 4-13, NKJV, Pp. 1793).

Before I speak on the topic of charity, I must address from where it comes from. For indirectly Apostle Paul in his description of love was also describing God. Love never fails, because love is God, God is love. It is only through this love of God’s which He has so freely given to everyone that we exhibit the heavenly virtue of charity.

Charity is more than benevolent giving; rather it is also, limitless, unconditional, it is filled with an open hearted-acceptance, and overwhelming need to do for others, much like God has done for us. Charity in short is loving, kind, and patient. It cannot be expressed out of envy, boastfulness, pride, rudeness, and it is never self-serving. Charity works out side of the spectrum of anger, of keeping records of wrong doings, as it is more powerful when applied through understanding and sympathy toward our fellow men and women who have less than we do. But the real miracle behind charity is found in the ideal giving of those who seem to have everything. The best example of this is a rich man who has everything but piece of mind, who constantly seeks for solace for actions done in order to become rich, or the remain rich, or in some other matter not related to finances but of relationships, ect. The act of forgiving this person or the offering of kind words which completely changes their way of thinking and or believing for the better can be charity as it lifts them from the bondage of guilt. I offer this example because I have known rich people that on the outside they seem happy, but on the inside they are dying, unfulfilled, left wanting for the words and the love of God.  Mind you this doesn’t have to be a rich person either; anyone could find themselves seeking God in this manner.

Charity therefore, comes from love, which comes directly from God. Charity does not originate with the human soul until God places his hand upon you. Yes, people do nice things for each other all the time, but true charity is the releasing of some sort of bondage which lifts another person’s spirits in such a manner your own heart is filled with the love of God. I liken this to random events, or better known as random acts of kindness, doing something completely unexpected for someone else, for the sake of doing it. This heavenly virtue is second only to love because it comes from love which comes from God.

1 Corinthians 13: 4-13, leaves no stone unturned. It leaves no one out whether you are an adult or a child. It is absolute in its message and can serve to affect your life in two ways. The first being it can if you abide by it, and do what is commanded by God, should set your heart free of sin. An example of this can be taken within personal relationships more predominately between husbands and their wives. If you show your spouse patience, love, kindness, and do not envy them in their accomplishments, nor put them down from your own boastfulness and pride then your heart will be lifted and filled with love, because they will want to love you even more. This also makes your heart slow to anger, much more forgiving, which is the building blocks of truth, loyalty, and trust. In the end this moves you to always wanting to protect them and to cherish them, thus preserving your relationship for an eternity. However, more negatively if you do not do these things which God has commanded, then you are instantly convicted in your heart and you are held prisoner of guilt and of shame for all time, until you ask God to release you. This releasing is in fact Gods greatest act of charity that which He shows through His mercy and again His never ending love.

Charity is always filled with hope that those who experience it shall pass it on to others they know and or don’t know.  It is hopeful that lifelong lessons are learned by the knowledge gained within the act of charity itself, whether it be given or received. Like love it is never failing as it spreads love like wildfire with each charitable act, and as promised by Jesus, we shall receive within the same measure we give to others.

Charity as it is written about in the Bible predominantly speaks upon the idea of giving up all your worldly assets to those who have nothing. Jesus speaks about giving away your wealth in order that you may be able to follow him;

“20 All these I have kept,” the young man said, “What do I still lack?” 21 Jesus answered, “If you want to be perfect, go sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come follow me.”

Jesus’s use of the word perfect is not in the strict meaning of doing no wrong, but rather being complete, with nothing left wanting. This is tied to charity because the rich man had vast wealth and the scriptures say he was saddened because he was unable or unwilling to give up his wealth even though it would allow him to follow Jesus. Suppose for an instant that the young rich man had released his burden of wealth, how many people might have been impacted positively? How many starving street dwellers would have been feed, and given a place for the night? What treasures would the young rich man have received in heaven as Jesus had promised him? Ironically, his name does not appear in scripture, just the denotation of (a young rich man), but all the Apostles who gave up everything and followed our Lord, their names are written in the Bible and in the Book of life forever, their stories have been told for over two thousand years, for we know their names.

“7 Every man should give what he has decided in his heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver” (2 Corinthians 9: 7, NKJV, Pp. 1813).

The true disconnect of the wealthy is found in the earthly privilege that they receive because of their wealth, and it is this that keeps them from giving it up, and keeps them in slaved to their wealth. Instead they fall to Satan’s temptation of being one who has, rather to one who has not. This is exactly the same temptation Satan used on Jesus in the desert:

“Then taking him to a high mountain, the devil showed Jesus in an instant all the empires of the world, “I will give you the power and glory of these kingdoms, for it is mine, and I can give it to anyone I want. All you have to do is worship me.” Jesus retorted, “It is written: ‘You must worship God and serve Him alone.’ Having exhausted all these ways of tempting Jesus, the devil left him, to return at a later time” (Lost Gospel Q, Q8, Pp41).

The instruction of Jesus to give it all up was in and of itself a test that he knew the young man would fail, because his heart was not in the things of heaven, but focused on the things on earth.

“17 He who is kind to the poor lends to the Lord, and he will reward him for what he has done” (Proverbs 19:17, NKJV, Pp. 985).

Charity is compassion, it is that hand in the darkness; it is the prevailing voice which gently guides you home when you are lost. It invokes untold emotions and sparks such incredible acts that defy all known logic. It is that kiss on the forehead to a dying wife, the gentle nudge of husband whose spouse is gripped by fear, the loving hug of a parent who has consoled their child, and it is that great reassuring smile of a stranger that has come to the rescue. God is in every act, He is present in every word, and he is an integral part of the giving of love which is turned into charity by everyone of our unselfish and unconditional deeds. My eyes fill with tears each time I see children spending time with the old, men helping to save a life, a women who shows her nurturing side to a child in need. In any of these examples it could easily be said about anyone one of us, showing that charity or receiving it. Truth be told, God exhibits his charity every day within each request of every sinner who asks for his or her sins to be forgiven. The heavenly virtue of charity is written upon your heart and once you make it a staple in your life there is nothing else which fills your soul with as much loving-kindness of God as to do something for someone else who needs that act to be done. Everything else falls away and your life is then being guided by God; your faith restored, your hope renewed, and your heart filled with God’s love.

Challenge question: With love being at the root of charity why are we not more charitable? List ten different charitable acts which you can do right now for ten different people whom you know or don’t know. Then once you have done these things, keep then between you and God.


If you have been moved by this blog I humbly invite you to leave a message telling me your thoughts and how this reflection has touched you. May peace and love be with you all the days of your life.  May God keep you and bless you.

Reflections 2: Virtue of Kindness

“36 Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.  37 Do not judge and you will not be judged. Do not condemn and you will not be condemned. Forgive and you will be forgiven. 38 Give and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” (Luke 6: 36-38, NKJV, Pp. 1582).

The question I ask myself every day before I go to sleep at night, faithfully without fail is; “Have I been kind to those around me and to those I have dealt with today?” I don’t always like the answer. In self-reflection I learn so much about who I am as a human being. I see my flaws more clearly, and in that process I see God’s loving hand molding me and shaping me like clay. In this walk with God I ask him questions and truthfully I don’t always get an answer when I would like to have it, but he always answers me when I least expect it. His kindness and His mercy is the virtue I try very hard to live up to with every breath I breathe.

So what is kindness as a virtue? It is charity for the sake of charity; it is doing for others because it is the right thing to do not because of some monetary reward. It is the showing of compassion for the sake of compassion, not because there is some emotional need being filled in return. It is being a friend to those who you otherwise would not be a friend to or even talk to, for the sake of friendship. It is showing empathy to those who are going through hard times, for the sake of showing them that you truly care, not because you will be given glory for it. Kindness is such a powerful word, it can be such a powerful act, and it invokes such powerful emotions when we express it with all our heart and soul.

“16 For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you will find disorder and every evil practice. 17 But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial, and sincere. 18 Peacemakers who sow in peace raise a harvest of righteousness.” (James 3: 16-18, NKJV, Pp. 1923).

Honesty is tied to integrity, which builds trust; this is such a powerful combination as with these values in place and an everyday part of your life kindness flows. It is very much like a snowball, once it starts rolling it automatically collects more snow and the bigger it gets. Like a snowball your kindness attracts the attention and respect of people who you have been kind to and the kinder you are the more they will want to be near you.  Our Lord and Savior was very much like this, for Jesus so wanted everyone to hear his message and to act upon it. His acts here on Earth reek of kindness, especially to those who were defenseless. He kept company with the lowliest of people, in the unlikeliest of groups, and healed those who were in and of themselves the most controversial and dysfunctional characters of their day. Jesus found time to listen, to love, to feed, to celebrate everyone and every moment in his life. He took great pleasure in being kind and has never asked for anything in return. It is this thought that burrows deep into my heart and brings tears to my eyes, because He gave his life for every man, women and child, and asks nothing in return for this price of man’s sins. How kind and merciful is this act of Jesus? How can we possibly fully measure his kindness to us?

I am humbled every time I ponder these two very powerful questions. I am also lead to the idea of how much more kind should I be with all those who I deal with daily. I will admit that members of our family and people who we love the most in personal relationships are the hardest to show kindness to all the time. This holds true for the single reason that kindness to our loved ones should be without prejudice or resentment. It is easier to be kind to a stranger who we do not know the back story too. But when we know some or even the entire story we have a tendency to become judgmental, jealous, filled with hypocrisy, selfish, and to some extent we over power, (always with the best intentions of course), the decisions of those we love the most. Somewhere in this mix we fall to Satan’s temptation of pardon less, possessive love, which is not love, but a form of control. We stop being a friend, a lover, a good parent, a good son or daughter, and a good person, turning into instead a scared, insecure, pathetic version of ourselves. It is only through self-reflection do we see these qualities clearly. It can be painful to see, and we often spend a great amount of life ignoring it, justifying our actions and never taking the blame for our lack in moral conduct. This in truth is the act Satan knows will help him to separate you from God in this eternal war between good and evil.

“22 What a man desires is unfailing love; better to be poor than a liar” (Proverbs 19:22, NJKV, Pp.986).

Therefore, it is important to remember James, the brother of Jesus who described kindness as being pure, peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial, and sincere. As it is equally important to remember how God looks at us from the judgment set, for the more you give the more you will receive.

One of my favorite lines found in proverbs 19 would have to be Proverbs 19: 20, because it is the hardest to do. It is the act of kindness when a friend or loved one takes the time to share wisdom with you, and in our world of today this activity is almost a lost art. Moreover, when we do share in this way it is often times received as being anything but kind.

“20 Listen to advise and accept instruction, and in the end you will be wise” (Proverbs 19:20, NJKV, Pp.986).

How many times have I given advice and it been ignored? Likewise, in reverse if we ask this question we must also ask, how many times have we received advise and ignore it? Within the dismissal of advice, what was lost had we attempted it? Personally, I know most of what I ask of my family will never be heard, because no one listens, because they know me, they know my back story, my flaws, my weakness, and thus the perfect advice is ignored. This was the same problem Jesus ran into when preaching to the people of his hometown for, “4 Jesus said to them, “Only in the hometown, among his relatives and in his own house is a prophet without honor” (Mark 6: 4, NKJV, Pg. 1536).

Satan uses these biases against us so that we will become frustrated and fight with those we love. I know in the past I have fallen to this greatest of deceptions and instead of attacking the problem with love and coming from a place which is pure of heart I retaliate with cruelty. We abandon kindness in those moments, just like we abandon God when we are mad at him and blame him for our own short comings. I bring this up to make this point; though we are imperfect and react badly at times, the virtue of true kindness is absolutely unselfish love; it is motivated by a pure heart, without motives driving the action being shown or expressed. It is voluntary given without bias or spite. It is the purposeful, everyday practice which inspires others to be kind and merciful. As a virtue, kindness is the smiles warn upon our face, that cheerful demeanor when asked a question, or being greeted. Kindness can be as is simple as the way we say “hello” when we really want to say “what!”, or it can be as simple as the act of listening without offering advice.

For in Matthew we find the true test of kindness,

 “21 For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also” (Matthew 6:21, NKJV, Pg. 1478).

At the end of the day before I go to sleep I also ask myself these questions, “Did I give any amount of satisfaction to those I dealt with today? More importantly am I satisfied with myself in regard to the day’s activities? Did I express loyalty to those I love? Did I show compassion and integrity in all that I did today?” As I stated earlier, I don’t always like the answer I receive to these questions, and it always reminds me that I need God in my life; I need his example of kindness and of love. I need to hand my sins over, and I need to allow Him to help me to perfect the right amount or measure of kindness that He would require of me each and every day.

Challenge question: If our kindness is measured in heaven, why do we struggle so with being kind to others?


If you have been moved by this blog I humbly invite you to leave a message telling me your thoughts and how this reflection has touched you. May peace and love be with you all the days of your life.  May God keep you and bless you.


Reflections 1: Virtue of Humility

“3 I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. 4 Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven” (Matthew 18: 3-4, NKJV, Pg. 1497).

Humility is a virtue that as a parent or a teacher we want all our children to have and to express to others around them. What we fail to see is that this characteristic of one’s personality is learned by example; our children watch very closely what we do, how we do it, and what we say to others. They see how we treat our family, friends, strangers, and enemies; no matter the intent this trait is what they emulate, and what they will become strictly by observation. Humility as a learned attribute to one’s character can be expressed in many ways because it means something different to each and every one of use. To Jesus, it is about becoming like an innocent child, changing how we treat others, and accepting openly the hand of our brothers.  To be humble is to place the needs of others first, to become modest; never taking credit for what you did not do, the automatic giving of respect, it is thinking about yourself less, and becoming active in charity. A person who is truly humble can look at themselves in self-reflection and see the error of their ways. To stay humble is a constant battle because we are not humble by nature; rather we are born in rebellion against God.

The most perfect example of humility is found in our savior, Jesus Christ, as he was arrested and tried by men who wanted him dead. They struck him, spit upon him, beat him, and judged him, only to crucify him, and our Savior took it and died for our sins. Jesus did not strike back, put a plague upon them, he did not cruse at them, nor did he seek revenge, rather he remained brave in the face of danger. He remained reverent in all his actions and teachings, accepting completely the sacrifice that was involved. He was like a child before his accusers as he had nothing to confess. Jesus showed courage in the face of his looming torcher and death while praying in the Garden of Gethsemane, for his task was the most difficult ever assigned by God. Jesus confronted his fear and uncertainty replacing it with love for all mankind.

“12 For whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted” (Matthew 23: 12, NKJV, Pg. 1506).

Jesus could have boldly stated making it clear to everyone his true mission and brashly misusing his power and authority, taking up the sword and caused a revolution as some men had wanted him to do. Jesus could have laid claim to the thrown of David, and been king of men, but if he had done all these things he would not be fulfilling his true purpose, as the true son of God. In retrospect his death would not have save humanity. His actions would not have been Gods will, and would have been viewed as being just as lofty as those he called hypocrites. Jesus would be anything but humble, and again his death would have been meaningless.  He could have declared his power and stopped the pain, suffering, and brought himself down from the cross had he wanted to. But again this would be showing a lack of humility, making his death and sacrifice again meaningless.  In fact, Jesus could have caved into his more mortal desires and married and had children, never fully realizing his full potential, ignoring God’s mission for his life. He could have become the exact opposite of humility, that being selfish and prideful, tiptoeing through life never sacrificing anything, with one glaring exception, the saving of the human soul and ultimately the redemption of man. The very fact that Jesus did not give in, ignored the obvious outcome of his actions by provoking the Pharisees, and ignoring their orders to work miracles so that they would believe in him, Jesus was exalted.

The truth is any one of us who choses humility in the eyes of God choses to be exalted.

I remember once as a young boy my grandmother took me shopping. She was going to buy me some new school clothes; I remember her making me try each and everything on until I couldn’t take it anymore.  After most of the afternoon had gone I was tired of trying on shirts and pants and shoes… I looked at her and said exasperated, “Are we done? Just buy the damn shirt and let’s go!” I will never forget the look upon my grandmother’s face. It was if I had not appreciated what she was doing for me, and truth be told I didn’t, in a childish way I expected it as if it was her duty to me. My grandmother looked at me through her glasses and said very calmly, “What I do for you now you may not appreciate, but when you are on your own and have nothing you will remember this day my boy. Then you will appreciate me.” I had been anything but humble, for her words cut me to the bone. I did not want my grandmother to feel I did not appreciate her. But yet my words made her feel that way. I knew if I had tried to say sorry she would not accept it, and I would only be saying it because I felt bad. So I was caught within a dilemma, “What should I say? What could I say?” The ride home was long and quiet; I knew she was going to tell my mother when I wasn’t around to hear. I knew my mother would be disappointed in me too. I cannot tell you how bad I felt, I just wanted to find a hole and hide in it forever. But it was from this, I learned to become humble in all aspects of my life. I owe that to my grandmother. To this day I say thank you when someone does something for me, I make sure they know how I appreciate them for all they have done. Though I am not perfect in this, I try very hard to remain as humble as possible.

“6 Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time.   7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you” (1Peter 5:6-7, NJKV, Pp.1935).

Becoming humble is a struggle; it requires dedication, long suffering, and practice. Signs of humility appear in your everyday speech from the most common words such as, “Please” and “Thank you”, to words like, “It would be my pleasure” or “It would be an honored.” It is in the actions you make, from opening a door for an elderly person, to thoughtfully offering your services to a person who needs your help rather than passing them by. It is in the thoughtfulness of others as you give your time to a charity, or in giving a family member that special, reassuring pat on the back when you know they are down. My personal favorite is always acknowledging your spouse, for all the things they do daily to make your life better than it would have been if you were on your own.  The giving of roses or a card for no reason out of the blue is a great place to start. Humility is not submission, but the act of thinking of others more than you do yourself. It is a tender act of love, compassion, and or mercy that shows what is truly in your heart. Humility is the shedding of a complicated, self-serving mindset into that of a child-like acceptance of others and of their needs, all without asking for a reward or having an expectation of something in return. Humility is selfless and needs no reward, for the act itself is its own reward. Finally Humility is that moral compass that keeps us honest, and on the right path. For those who master the virtue of humility, the doors to the kingdom of heaven are opened, and God Himself is standing there waiting to receive you.

Challenge question: Wouldn’t it be easier when we become hotheaded, and self-righteous, to remember that humility is what God expects in all situations?  In those instances doesn’t it just make more since to quiet your tongue until you have come back into a calmer mindset?


If you have been moved by this blog I humbly invite you to leave a message telling me your thoughts and how this reflection has touched you. May peace and love be with you all the days of your life.  May God keep you and bless you.