Silence As A Weapon

3 “Set a guard over my mouth, Lordkeep watch over the door of my lips. 4 Do not let my heart be drawn to what is evil so that I take part in wicked deeds along with those who are evildoers; do not let me eat their delicacies.” ~ Psalm 141:3-4

I am not going to make this long nor am I going to mince words. God did not intend for us to use silence as a weapon against members of our families whom we disagree with, or friends who have made us mad, or children whom are being hard to handle as children often are. God did not intend for us to use silence as a weapon and exile people from their homes or to make them feel uncomfortable in their own skin. His desire was not to give people the most mighty of weapons to make others guess where they stand or force them to jump through hoops to earn affection! God did not give us tongues so as to not use them, rather he wanted us to voice our opinions respectfully! Likewise, love is not silent! If you have ever said to someone that you love them, then turn around and use silence the first time or second time or any time they have disappointed you, or made you mad, or upset you for any reason, well then you obviously did not love them as much as you thought!


God gave us free will to use as a guiding force to learn, to grow, to become more like Him. I have never known God to be silent in my life. I have wondered from time to time where He might have gone, why He may not be as vocal, but I have always heard His loving voice in my heart. I cannot say the same for some people in my life which will remain unnamed, as it is not my intent to single them out, but rather use their silence to show how irresponsible it is and how much of a waste of time it is to chose silence over forgiveness, over true love, over the opportunity to grow closer through your arguments. It is certain to me that God made all of us different, with our own thoughts, feelings, likes, and dislikes and each of us have a tongue to express these differences. It is a choice not to voice your feelings or to share them through communication! The notion you had no choice, well that is stupid! Recently I have been told by a friend they where silent because they felt they had no choice. My friends… you always have a choice! You always have the power to share or not to share, to give or not to give.

I do not pray to God to watch over my mouth to keep me silent, rather I pray that He watches over my mouth so I speak with respect, honor, dignity when addressing those who I disagree with. I do not pray to God to seal my lips, for this will happen at my death and I say to you all now that I am not dead and will not be dead for quite some time! I have a lot to say and a lot to share. There will be no one who I will allow to take my voice from me, no one will I allow to keep me so bottled up I react with silence!

Let’s explore this from another angle…. If I say that I love you then you can expect me to voice when I am happy with you, when I am disappointed with you, when I am upset at you and in that I may ask for some time alone but in no manner am I withdrawing from you and will use silence to punish you. You can expect the truth at all times no matter how painful that may be. I was given the opportunity and honor to love you and therefore I will guard that love with my voice, with my words, with my actions, with the truth! That my friends is what God does every day for every one of us here on this rock we call Earth! God is not going to sit on His throne in Heaven and look at you on judgement day and say nothing! Jesus is not going to defend you against Satan on judgement day with His proverbial silence! So why should I recoil from those I love and punish them with silence. To do anything that God would not do is not perfect, and therefore a sin. Silence as a weapon is a sin! Silence used to punish those you do not like is a sin!


15 “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. 16 But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. 17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.” Matthew 18:15-17

Conflict is not settled through silence, rather it is settled by everyone knowing what everyone else is thinking and feeling. How could I ever settle an argument if I have no clue why your angry? Out of ever tool God gave mankind – mind reading – was not among them!  Jesus could have never settles disputes had the two parties not come to Him first with their grievance. So I call it stupid for people to think the other person should know why, should understand, if no words had been exchanged which highlighted the grievance in the first or second or any place! At that point the angered party is just being willful which is also a sin! Why? Because God is love, and God is not silent, he does not lie, He does not alienate, He does not remain quite. Therefore, love is all about inclusion, forgiveness, mercy, and communication. Love is patient, it is kind, it is not quite, it is loud and sometimes obnoxious and painful, but more than anything else it is real and it is there with you every day for the rest of your life if you let it in. But silence is the mark of a hardened heart, and to be such a person is liken to condemning yourself to sin.

So I say to you all… be not silent, be not cowardly, be not weak, be not sinful, through away your ignorance, cast out your stubbornness and give in to the noise of love. Give your soul to the sharing of love, to the giving of your thoughts and feelings, for to do anything else is against your nature and against our Lord Jesus Christ.


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Brian Keith

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Brother Brian

Brother Brian currently serves within the Archdiocese of Los Angeles Catholic School System. He is currently in his twentieth year of teaching.

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